Long-time readers of Uphill Writing will know that I’ve sometimes go off on a tangent about (especially) TV shows where people walk into a room and NEVER close the door, not even te front door to the house. People also never say “goodbye” on the phone. They either hang up, or the scene shifts after the important information is delivered.
OK, so I understand that. In a 45 to 49 minute TV show (up to 15 minutes of commercials to make up the hour), time is precious. It cannot be wasted on bits that do not move the story along.
Well, fine. I get it. And now I have to get it about dialogue.
Me? I love writing dialogue. It’s a specialty. Unfortunately, it is not always a specialty that works. Why? Because my people speak like real people, and friends, our readers just don’t have the time for that. Yeah, I know. It sucks. Ah, well.
In a part of his wonderful essay, “Seven Tools for Talk“, by James Scott Bell, he gives this example:
Mr. Bells text is in green.
“Hello, Mary.”
“Hello, Sylvia.”
“My, that’s a wonderful outfit you’re wearing.”
“Outfit? You mean this old things?”
“Old thing! It looks practically new.”
“It’s not new, but thank you for saying so.”
This piece of dialogue is quite real. People actually do speak this way (much like people say goodbye on the phone and close the door when they come into a room).
That said, how would that dialogue sound if it were trimmed to keep the story moving and to avoid boring the reader?
“Hi, Mary.”
“Sylvia! I didn’t see you.”
“My, that’s a wonderful outfit you’re wearing.”
“I need a drink.”
So, here we see a full conversation, but one that actually leads somewhere. One that leaves us wondering. What’s up? Why does Mary need a drink?
How about the dialogue in your own stories? Do you write for reality, or do you write for flow?
Your thoughts?






There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio... and isn't it time you experienced some of them?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Dialog. Another good tidbit for us. I can’t keep up with you, guy. When am I going to have time to think up my own blogs if I am reading all of your good blogs.
Keep on writing. Thanks.
Well, I think I finally understand how you use the concept of flow – like a river it has to ‘go’ somewhere. Another good point to keep in mind while writing/editing/rewriting. Thanks for the insight.
{ 1 trackback }